You're not the only one with mixed emotions, you're not the only ship drifting in the ocean.
I remember this was the Rolling Stones song we listened to on the first crossing I did with Tres Hombres seven years ago. And I'm listening to it again now. Fighting our way to the Channel entrance. The last days were cold days, winds from the North East and sailing full-on by. It seems we may not be allowed to sail back home, but do we really want to sail back home? How are we going to find Europe? Mixed Emotions.
Six years of sailing around the Atlantic and nearly home again. This time for the first time being captain. All the different captains I was sailing with coming up in my head when I stared over the ocean. What did I learn from who and what do I do with this now?
Some things come up: first sailing together on a Tjalk with Jaap in the Zeeland delta: Always try to keep the ship as close to the wind as possible, falling off you can always do later. After hoisting the leeboards hundreds of times it was time for countless hours behind the helmet. Learning how to sail on strong currents in the Oosterschelde.
Later when I first stepped on board on the Tres Hombres in Portugal my first skipper was Lammert: The ocean has many ways to show her size (sometimes it's hell, sometimes it's paradise). The love for the ocean was born in the very first week of this Atlantic round trip.
After that year I was sailing with Andreas: how to keep the ship in perfect shape, a good combination of hard work and having parties in the harbours.
Next thing I remember: sitting with Francois a few years later in Boca Chica looking at the weather forecast above the North Atlantic: Depression after depression made our computer screen red. The only thing he said: That will go fast.
From Harry on the Morning Star: you can talk forever about the weather but in the end, you can't change anything about it.
Later I learned from Fosse on the Wylde Swan how to sail proudly backwards in a parade, and remember: a life full of adventure gets also boring after a while.
Just some things from years and years sailing around. And now I have to do it on my own. Now Bob Dylan's singing: Jeah How does it feel, like a Rolling Stone?
But not without a home: we are sailing home and even the eastern winds will not prevent us to come back.
Wiebe